Well hello again. Thanks for tuning in. This past weekend I traversed the Scottish country side by driving northwest into the Isle of Skye. Before I talk about that, it may interest you to know that a tragedy-turned-opportunity struck this weekend. I was playing golf on the beautiful Strathyrum course when I uncharacteristically missed the fairway and hit my ball into the heather. Some little Scottish dwarf yelled at me, saying that I was slowing play despite my hasty playing style. I pulled my trusty 5-iron (remember the clubs I bought for 10 bucks?) and executed a perfect stroke. Instead of resting the ball on the green, it lay motionless as the head of my 5-iron went sailing away. I started to cry because my club was broken and the gimpy Scot started laughing at me. I stopped crying like a bitch and threw my headless shaft like a javelin, impaling the grumpy Scottish midget who really had it coming.
It was a good round.
The trip to Skye was great. I will post pictures on facebook soon that will describe the experience much better than I could with words. It was a thoroughly "outdoorsey" trip with lots of hiking, scenery, nature, and other semi-gay stuff.
On a completely unrelated note, I had one of the most unexpected conversations in Scotland this afternoon. Note-the following conversation actually did happen.
300 pound Texan wearing a 10-gallon cowboy hat and speaking with a thick southern accent: 'Scuse me
Me: Yo
Guy: Yall got a school in this town?
Me: Well yeah...University of St Andrews, its kind of a college town?
Guy: Why you doin' all this book learnin' when you gots golf to be played?
Me: haha...... (courtesy chuckle)
Guy: .... (looks puzzled)
Me: ....
Guy: You a methodist?
Me: No, I'm Jewish
Guy: You're the one's always knockin' on my door!
Me: I think those are Jahova's witnesses
Guy: Who are the Jews then?
Me: We killed Jesus
Guy: Oh right! Well, keep up the good work!
Me: Will do
Guy: Adios
Me: Bye........fuckin weirdo
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