Hello fans. Reading week is here! I'll be going to Amsterdam on Monday in order to inhale marijuana smoke, consume hashish laced confections, have sex with diseased prostitutes/animals, and visit the home of Ann Frank. I'll tell you how that goes when I get back.
For now, I can finally offer some seasoned insight on how to 'deal' with St. Andrews. First, let's get something straight: St Andrews is a thoroughly boring place. So why are there so many people here enjoying themselves, including me? I've come to realize that there are three methods for the prevention of boredom induced suicide:
1. Get a car - This way you can actually leave St Andrews. This is the most uncommon method because gas is expensive and you have to drive kind of far away in order to escape the ominous bubble of boring that covers the east coast of Scotland. Plus, this may interfere with method #3.
2. Play Golf - Golf is a highly unrewarding, yet time consuming activity. There are approximately 7.8 million courses within a 5 miles of town. Pick one.
3. Get Drunk! - Alcoholism is, by far, the most popular method of averting boredom. Everyone here is drunk. All the time. All 500 people in residence hall are drunk 24 hours a day. My professors teach drunk. The school children sip flasks in the morning and are wasted by recess. Even the old people are drunk, which is weird.
I know you're asking yourself, "What method does Matt prefer?" I've actually learned to mix all three. I spend most of my time driving around town drunk in a golf cart. It's a blast.
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When you're in Amsterdam, go to http://www.cafegollem.nl/default_EN.asp
That bar has Westvleteren, regarded by some as the best beer in the world. The beer store across the street (from the bar) also sells it.
I recommend smoking a J before enjoying it responsibly.
what ray said...but add a drunk crusty whore into the mix too.
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